Ah, The Irish

On vacation in Rome,  I noticed a marble column in St. Peter’s with a golden telephone on it.  As a young priest passed by,  I asked who the telephone was for.  The priest told me it was a direct line to Heaven, and if I’d like to call,  it would be a thousand dollars.  I was amazed, but declined the offer.

Throughout Italy,  I kept seeing the same golden telephone on a marble column. At each,  I asked about it and the answer was always the same: a direct line to Heaven and I could call for a thousand dollars.

Then –

I finished my tour in Ireland . I decided to attend Mass at a local village church. When I walked in the door I noticed the golden telephone. Underneath it there was a sign stating: “DIRECT LINE TO HEAVEN 25 cents.” “Father,” I said,
“I have been all over Italy and in all the cathedrals I visited, I’ve seen telephones exactly like this one. But the price is always a thousand dollars. Why is it that this one is only 25 cents?”

The priest smiled and said, “Darlin’, you’re in Ireland now. It’s a local call…